Ramblings from a Black Woman in 2020
In my last post, I touched on how although this year has been a whirlwind, I am thankful for the important topics that are being brought to light because of it. The biggest as of today and current events is the racial injustice Black men, woman and children are experiencing still to this day.
I am going to re-write an excerpt that I posted on my Instagram the other day...
“She can't be yours”
“Why would you adopt a black baby? Do you get some sort of funding from that?”
“You have n...er hair”
“You must live in the ghetto”
“You’re too poor to have a pool at your house”
“Did you know that you’re a slave?”
“My mom said I am not allowed to play with you”
“You’re not even that black”
“I am more black than you”
“You just have a really good tan”
“You’re the whitest black girl I know”
“I am just not into black girls”
“I’ve never been with a black girl before”
“It must be so fun to be a nanny”
“Make sure you always carry his birth certificate with you”
“He can’t be yours”
These are just SOME of the comments I have heard in my 28 years on this earth. Do you know the worst part and the most hurtful one?
The last one. “he can’t be yours”.
You may think...well I mean it’s not that bad. and yes, you’re right. it isn’t derogatory by any means but it’s the same comment my mom got...28 years ago. 28 years. Obviously that’s nothing compared to the 500 years prior but it is hard for me to grasp that the same mentality I saw and heard growing up is still so prevalent.
These comments are just the surface of what I have heard and experienced. I have been followed around stores, questioned on how I afforded a $120 Coach purse, slammed up against a gym locker and spit on, kicked, been accused of cheating because "I couldn't possibly be smart enough to study/know the answers on my own".
I am bi-racial and these have been just a few of my experiences in this world. We need to do better. The Black Lives Matter movement, racial justice, equality are all things that I am consciously making a daily effort to submerge myself in. I am guilty too. I have been silent for a long time. I thought that that was just the way it was and that my voice wouldn't change things. And though I can't do it alone, since being more vocal, I have gracefully been able to educated friends and family members who also want to do better.
As a mother, it is my job to teach Noah about his black culture. Down the road, about current events and past. To teach him how to safely and properly advocate for himself and his friends and others. To make sure he does understand the privilege he does have and to make sure he uses it properly to fight for others. Racism is taught. We need to do better for our children and communities. It all starts at home.
To every Black person out there,
I see you.
I hear you.
I am with you.
I will not be silent.
I will fight with you.
I will fight for you.
I am with you.
How are you teaching diversity and racial inclusion in your home?